MOTORHEAD JOURNEY

OK, you’ve been to the doctor and the doctor has told me that my PSA is high. What the heck is a PSA and what does it mean, high?  From the visualMD.com, please click on the following link to view the procedures

http://www.thevisualmd.com/player.swf?file=videos/PC_PROSTATE_DIAGNOSIS_FINAL.mp4&autostart=true&stretching=exactfit&logo=/images/banners/logo2_small.png&skin=skin/mod/modieus.swf&allowfullscreen=true&usefullscreen=true

Now the doctor tells me I have to come in for a DRE. A Digital Rectal Exam? What is that for?  Bent over, my cheeks spread and the doctor is putting his finger in my anus (Dear Lord--I hope I remembered to clean the rust out of my my tail pipe); feels like I’m going to pee. Now I have to wipe my self, I feel so embarrassed I do not even wipe. I pull up my shorts as quick as I can and for the rest of the day I find myself sliding in my pants.

OK, now I’ve had a DRE performed. The doctor tells me that there are some hard areas on my prostate. Whoa! What gives? What does this mean? The doctor tells me that I’m going to need a biopsy to determine if my prostate is cancerous? Cancer? Cancer,? What do I do, what can I expect, what about my mortality, my family? Where do I go? Who can I talk to? Suddenly my whole world is topsy turvey.

The results of the biopsy have come back. Cancer!!! What the hell is a Gleason number? What does it mean? 

There are numerous treatments for prostate cancer and each has its own benefits and drawbacks. Patients and their prostate specialist must weigh many factors when determining the best treatment option. Age, Gleason number (measure of aggressiveness), PSA, lifestyle and quality of life issues all play a very important part in the equation of finding the optimal treatment.  Never hesitate to obtain a second opinion!  (Motorhead Jargon—“back-seat driver.”)

Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician.

“Grades of Oil” (Gleason Number)

• 10 W 30- Gleason 2-5.
  A lightweight oil for lubrication. Numbers that need to be watched very closely and monitored by your Urologist.
            
• 10 W 40- Gleason 6-7. 
  A heavier grade of oil for a more complex engine. A Gleason number of 6 or 7 needs prostate treatment as suggested by your Urologist.
            
• 10 W 50- Gleason 8-10. A very heavy grade oil for a well used engine. Get to the mechanic (Urologist) before complete engine malfunction.

Depending upon your Gleason number, your Urologist will recommend a treatment plan. Remember, it is advisable and informative, to seek a second opinion (Motorhead Jargon—“estimate”).  There could be up to nine options to choose from which will determine your quality of life:

1. Watch and Wait: (Motorhead Jargon—“Polishing your car on a rainy day.”)
   Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician.
2. Prostatectomy: (Motorhead Jargon—“Having your “Wheels” high-jacked"
   a. General Surgery—(Motorhead Jargon—“Hand Wheel Wash.”) 
   b. Robotic Surgery—da Vinci—(Motorhead Jargon—"Automatic Wheel Wash.”)
   c. Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician.
3. Brachytherapy (Radioactive Seed Implants):(Motorhead Jargon—“Quartz Beams.”) Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician.
4. LHRH (Hormone Therapy): (Motorhead Jargon—“Synthetic Motor Oil.”)
   Lupron: is a man-made form of a hormone that regulates many  processes in the body. Lupron overstimulates the body's own production of certain hormones, which causes that production to shut down temporarily. It reduces the amount of testosterone in men or estrogen in women. Lupron is used in men to treat the symptoms of prostate cancer. Lupron   treats only the symptoms of prostate cancer and does not treat the cancer itself. Use any other medications your doctor has prescribed to best treat your condition. For more Lupron information click on link. http://www.drugs.com/lupron.html.
   Casodex: is an anti-androgen. It works in the body by preventing the actions of androgens (male hormones).    Casodex is used together with another hormone to treat prostate cancer.
   Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician.
5. CryoSurgery (Freezing): (Motorhead Jargon—“What happens when you forget to use anti-freeze.”) Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician
6. Orchiectomy (Removal of the testicles): (Motorhead Jargon— “lug-nut removal.”)

   Orchiectomy (surgical castration): Even though this is a type of surgery, its main effect is as a form of hormone therapy. In this operation, the surgeon removes the testicles, where more than 90% of the androgens, mostly testosterone, are made. With this source removed, most prostate cancers stop growing or shrink for a time.
   This is done as a simple outpatient procedure. It is probably the least expensive and simplest way to reduce androgen levels in the body. But unlike some of the other methods of lowering androgen levels, it is permanent, and many men have trouble accepting the removal of their testicles. Some men having the procedure are concerned about how it will look. If wanted, artificial silicone sacs filled with saline (salt water) can be inserted into the scrotum. These look and feel like testicles.
   Possible side effects of orchiectomy are:

   • hot flashes (these may go away with time) 
   • breast tenderness and growth of breast tissue 
   • osteoporosis (bone thinning) which can lead to broken bones  
   • anemia (low red blood cell counts) 
   • decreased mental acuity (sharpness) 
   • loss of muscle mass 
   • weight gain 
   • fatigue 
   • decrease in HDL ("good") cholesterol 
   • depression 
   Click here for more information.
7. Cyberknife (High energy controlled radio surgery): (Motorhead Jargon—“GPS”)
   Click here for more information.
   Click here to see National Institute of Health information on Cyberknife clinical trials.
   Click on this link to view Cyberknife treatment at Siani Hospital, Baltimore, Maryland.
8. External Beam (high-energy radiation beams): (Motorhead Jargon—“plasma cutter.”)
   Click here for more information.
   Read about Chesapeake Urology’s radiation options. Click on this link, go to “Doctor’s Corner,” click on “more videos,” and click on “Prostate Cancer Options” to hear a Chesapeake Urology physician.
9. Proton Beam Therapy--a type of radiation therapy that uses nuclear technology to precisely shoot fast-moving ions into tumors. Some doctors say proton therapy reduces the risk of complications, such as impotence and incontinence, in relation to other types of radiation therapy. (Motorhead Jargon—"Octane Booster.")
   Johns Hopkins Health Alerts.com
   US News - Health
   Loma Linda University Medical Center: Protom Technology
   Massachusetts General Hospital: Proton Beam Radiosurgery
10. HIFU (High-Intensity Ultra-Sound—Non-Invasive): (Motorhead Jargon— “theft alarm")
    Prostate Cancer Research
    HIFU Worldwide Physician Directory

MOTORHEAD JARGON DEFINITIONS


Biopsy	Emission Test
Diagnosis	Dyno Test
DRE	Checking Exhaust Pipe
ED	Key on, engine not running
Fatigue	200,000 miles
Gleason Number	Motor Oil Designations
Hormone Therapy & Hot Flashes	Overheated Engine
Impotence	No Get Up and Go
Incontinence	Hole in Radiator
Loss of Sex Drive	Petal to floor but car won't go
Orchiectomy	Lug-nut removal
Prostatectomy	Car-jacked
PSA	Emission Test
Radiation Therapy	Quartz Headlights
Robotic Surgery	Automatic Car Wash
Support	Jiffy Lube
Testosterone	Octane Boost
Treatment	Auto Detailing
Watch & Wait	AAA No-show

MOTORHEAD HUMOR

A well to do middle aged CEO was so wrapped up in his business, and making money, he constantly forgot birthdays, anniversaries, dinner engagements, and the like.
On his 25th wedding anniversary night, the CEO came home, as usual, forgetful, and empty handed.

The CEO’s wife had it at this point. She artfully told her husband that when she woke up tomorrow morning she better have a present that could go from 0-240 in a matter of seconds. The CEO nodded OK.
The next morning when the wife woke up, there by her bedside was a brand new
BATHROOM SCALE.

Funeral arrangements for the CEO are still pending.

GGS April 09

 

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